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BlackAdvent
The Flag of BlackAdvent
Motto:
I don't care about your booty.
Capital Provnik
Official Languages English, Gibberish
Other Languages Canadian, Monkey, and Spanish
Government
  • Federal
 
Federal Government
Party Day July 31, 2006
Area
 • Total

55.669 mile diameter (5 Sept. 06)
Population
 • Civilians
 • Military

1,219 Working Citizens (5 Sep. 06)
361 Soldiers (1 Sep. 06)
National Animal The Follaker
Official Religion Mixed
Popular Religion Whoism
National Sport Insult Swordfighting
Income
  • Gross Individual
  • After Taxes

$62.04
$44.67
Literacy Rate: 95.05% (5 Sept. 06)
Currency 1 Gollager (Gollager) = 100 Gullies
Resources
 • Connected
Cattle Rubber
Iron Lead Lumber Marble Oil Silver Sugar Uranium

The nation of BlackAdvent is comprised of a bunch of Celtic people who enjoy pina coladas and singing Broadway songs. Located on the whole island of St. Lucia.

History Edit

The Best Laid Plans...

During the Era of Exploration, the Celtic people made an attempt to find India by traveling west, so that they could get rich and buy off the English crown. Sadly, no one told them that some idiot named Christopher Columbus already tried going west... and had failed miserably. Nonetheless, the Celts were determined, and the greatest minds of their people (Five really old guys, a pothead, and that crazy 5-year old kid who thinks he's an animal) devised a plan to reach India. It went through 7 1/2 iterations.

Each plan was extremely flawed.

1- Try and use a fart powered ship to cross the Atlantic. They ran out of beans.

2- Do nothing. People got really bored.

3- Ask England for help. The natives are still waiting for England to stop laughing.

4- Whine. The volunteers died of dehydration.

5- Ask for celestial intervention. Stonehenge didn't work as planned.

6- Sneak aboad a Spanish galleon. Celts aren't that stealthy.

7- Build a ship and cross the Atlantic. Some old guy in a DeLorean made this one. No one listen.

While trying to come up with an 8th plan (all we know is that it involved Queen Elizabeth and a pineapple), pirates kidnapped the next group of volunteers and set sail for the Caribbean. Now, about 2 weeks into the voyage, the prisoner Celts staged a game that led to them winning the ship: flipping a one-sided coin. (The only trick they knew how to do.) The two parties eventually came to an understanding and had an equivalent of a modern-day kegger.

The official history of BlackAdvent, as written by its leader, BlackPriest, becomes so disorganized at this point that it is widely suspected that he was extremely drunk when he wrote it. However, sometime between the next morning and whenever people got over their hangovers, the nation of BlackAdvent was born.


Historical Stuff That No One Cares About

Again, the official history of the country is extremely muddled at this point, but this is widely suspected to be a sign of boredom. As a result, nothing spectacular is said to have occurred between the nation's founding and July 31, 2006.


World Recognition

On July 31, 2006, the nation of BlackAdvent was finally recognized by the world populace as a soverign nation. The English are still laughing.

Culture Edit

Religion

The majority of the citizens practice a recentely founded religion known only as Whoism. Not much is known about its roots, but it seems to be some cross between Christianity and Islam. The citizens call their deity "The Great Golden Who". (Whether or not this is the God of Christians, Muslims, and Jews is hotly debated.)


Insult Swordfighting

See the article 'Insult Swordfighting'.

Economy Edit

Resources

The economy of this nation mainly relies on industries based on its natural resources: the meat industry (Cattle) and toys (Rubber). Their business model can be summed up like this: They make money because they have money, and they have money because they make money.


Questions? Comments? Concerns? ........Dirty Jokes?

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