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Sirhan Oswald

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Sirhan Oswald
SirhanOswald
Office Server of the People of South Ohio
Term of Office May 1, 2006 - present
Predecessor None
Successor Incumbent
Date of Birth November 22, 1963
Place of Birth Springfield, South Ohio
Political Party None

Sirhan Oswald (born November 22, 1963) is the elected "Server of the People" of South Ohio. He is notable for his role in the Nine Month Revolution where him and other anarchist/libertarian forces in Springfield revolted against the US backed Ohio government. Before the revolution though, he was a writer who penned many political, social, economic, and philosophical essays and novels.

Biography Edit

Oswald was born to Charles and Lynette Oswald in then, Springfield, Ohio, now the capital of South Ohio. As a teen, he attended local North High School where he mantained all As three out of four years there, despite being arrested four times during the school year. Today, he describes his early run-ins with the law as "Teenage rebellion mixed with ... future political ambitions." He was awarded several scholarships; yet, to his family's dismay, refused to go to college.

Time in Canada Edit

Upon graduating from high school, he moved to Canada. He travelled throughout the nation, spending the most time in Montréal where he lived his first year there, then again for two years before returning to Springfield. While in Montréal, he was severely beaten outside of a church after he was caught spray painting a large swastika on it. He was beaten with a metal rod and suffered two broken legs, a broken rib, and several large cuts. The notable potch marks on his face were caused by the beating.

It was during his recovery that he wrote his first essay, The Legality and Morality of Brainwashing in Religious Organizations, a hostile attack on organized religion in general and governments' inability to monitor them. At the time, it went largely unnoticed. He wrote two more essays before returning to Springfield; The Propaganda of Music and Minds of Our Masters.

Return to Springfield Edit

In May of 1988, he returned to Springfield where he spent time writing. With his ever growing rap sheet and transgressive nature, he had trouble getting a job and was homeless. Later that year, he was offered shelter by a local Catholic church. He agreed. In memoirs, he would later say that he stole from the organization. In January of 1989, he was kicked out by the president of the organization oficially for not getting a job, though the more commonly accepted reason is because his previous essays were discovered by the president.

Imprisonment and release Edit

Within a month of leaving the shelter, he stole a police car and crashed it into a light pole. Due to his prior record and hostile attitude in court, he was given a seven year sentence and spent five and a half years in prison. During this time, he wrote nineteen essays, and two novels, a majority of his writings. On December 1994, he was realesed on probation. Upon release, he moved to Cincinnati, Ohio where he lived until June 1995. During his time there, he wrote the short anti-novel, Profit, a fictional story of a man that works diligently for a large corporation only to be fired when foreign market instabilty forces the company to downsize. After being fired, the man decides to go on a murder spree only to find out that the last several years of his life have been tainted due to mental illness. Profit is widely regarded as one of his best novels and is his best selling work.

Personal tragedy Edit

After June of 1995, he again returned to Springfield where he once again continued to write while living homeless. On August 1, 1998, his parents were shot and killed during a botched home robbery in their home. A despondent Oswald tried to commit suicide two weeks later. His body, passed out from lethal amounts of pills, was found by a homeless woman and was taken to local Community Hospital. There, he had his stomach pumped and survived. He was given professional psychiatric treatment and was released a month later after renting an aparment. Seven weeks later, he was able to get a job as an inventory supervisor at a local warehouse. He worked there and continued to write while becoming more politically active and gaining revolutionist supporters.

Nine Month Revolution Edit

Since 2003, Oswald had been gaining more and more supporters of his syndicalist ideas. On August 11, 2005, Oswald and his syndicalist supporters, known as the Blacks, stormed local National Guard and police stations in and around Springfield, Ohio. The result was an eight and a half month war between the Oswald led Blacks and the US led Ohio National Guard. The fighting left much of Springfield in ruins and thousands of civilians dead. The US/Ohio government offered the Dayton Treaty (named after the neighboring city of Dayton, Ohio, where the treaty was signed) to the Blacks after strong United Nations orders to cease fighting. The treaty officially recongnized South Ohio as an independent nation while assuring that the US and Ohio governments would not have to pay any reparations to them. It was signed on April 23, 2006.

Current office Edit

As of May 1, Sirhan Oswald has been the official Server of the People, the equivalent of president or prime minister, of South Ohio. From April 23, 2006 to May 1, he was the de facto leader of South Ohio while elections were being held. His only opponent in the election was Marc LaMarr, a communist who had fought in the Nine Month Revolution. LaMarr only received 9% of the vote though.

Under Oswald's guidance, South Ohio has seen fast recovery from the war. The war left many public works buildings destroyed along with no power in the region and virtually no infrastructure. Still, Oswald has met critism for some of his actions, including his handling of the war with Indaina and high tax rates. During the war with Indaina, in which Indaina suddenly attacked South Ohio, Oswald accepted a peace agreement from them though there was no repayment of war time losses by Indaina.

Trivia Edit

  • Oswald has written over 41 essays and five novels.
  • He is a fan of the Cincinnati Bengals, a professional football team.
  • He walks with a slight limp due to his beating in Montréal.
  • He has yet to marry.
  • He has over 30 tattoos across his body.

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